The idea of becoming a parent is very rarely innate. It usually is planted in our heads by an external source. There is often constant nagging by elders who await the arrival of the child more than we do (I have even been threatened!). Sometimes there are subtle hints thrown at us by other married friends, who either project it negatively or positively, but project it anyways. For some traditional couples, it is the next best thing to do post marriage. For some it is planned after years of planning and in rare cases its an accident. Be it any of the above reasons, a child is going to change "your life as you knew it".
A child, can never be, just an addition in your life. A child is always either the change you wanted or the change you never wanted. No matter how many parents you talk to, or how many parents you have seen around yourself, each parenting experience is unique. It is different purely because of the varying contexts and mental states of each set of parents. When you bring a life into the world, you have to see it through and there is no round about to this. And while many of us would be lucky to have our parents helping us with most of the challenging phases of early parenting, most of us have to fend for ourself and often get lost in the stream of random advises. A child is an important life altering experience and no matter how well you think you are prepared for it, it is always going to shake things around you. I have met parents in my o clinical experience who admit being clueless about parenting and their professional confidence just crumbles when the daunting aspect of child care stares them in the eye.
Bringing your child into existence is a huge responsibility and the list of duties keeps growing longer and longer. So this decision should be a responsible one and we should take the plunge only if we are sure that we would be able to make justice to it. Having said that, it is not scary at all if you are well read and well planned. Lets just face it, we are not like other mammals, with intuitive good parenting skills. Especially our generation is so lost, that we need cues and repeated instructions at every bend. But it is an unknown route, no matter how frequently it is televised or demonstrated. And venturing into it should be a responsible decision and not a fanciful one.
P. S. - My next series of posts is going to explore the multiple aspects of pregnancy apart from the obvious health perspective.
A child, can never be, just an addition in your life. A child is always either the change you wanted or the change you never wanted. No matter how many parents you talk to, or how many parents you have seen around yourself, each parenting experience is unique. It is different purely because of the varying contexts and mental states of each set of parents. When you bring a life into the world, you have to see it through and there is no round about to this. And while many of us would be lucky to have our parents helping us with most of the challenging phases of early parenting, most of us have to fend for ourself and often get lost in the stream of random advises. A child is an important life altering experience and no matter how well you think you are prepared for it, it is always going to shake things around you. I have met parents in my o clinical experience who admit being clueless about parenting and their professional confidence just crumbles when the daunting aspect of child care stares them in the eye.
Bringing your child into existence is a huge responsibility and the list of duties keeps growing longer and longer. So this decision should be a responsible one and we should take the plunge only if we are sure that we would be able to make justice to it. Having said that, it is not scary at all if you are well read and well planned. Lets just face it, we are not like other mammals, with intuitive good parenting skills. Especially our generation is so lost, that we need cues and repeated instructions at every bend. But it is an unknown route, no matter how frequently it is televised or demonstrated. And venturing into it should be a responsible decision and not a fanciful one.
P. S. - My next series of posts is going to explore the multiple aspects of pregnancy apart from the obvious health perspective.
